The weather here has been a chronic-pain, migraine-inducing nightmare. So what better time to try a new lube than when you’re trying to literally fuck a migraine away? These past few weeks I had the distinct pleasure if trying The Butters Cocoa Butter Lube (henceforth, BCBL).

For those of you who missed my last review on The Butters, I’ll give you a brief rundown. The Butters Hygienics Co. was created in 2015 by Jerome Nichols as a way to care for hair and skin, as well as find a safe and simple lubricant and make all of these products affordable. Zanita is The Butters “Chief Executive Assistant Left Hand Whoa-Man” and an amazing human being. This is, of course, a very, very, VERY short version of the story, and I don’t want to tell it wrong, so I suggest you learn more directly from Jerome by clicking here.

When talking about oil-based lubricants in the past, I have been dismissive at best and vehemently opposed at worst. The thing is, I have known some very specific facts about oil-based lubes that have been tested over the years. Facts include:

  • Oil-based lubes break down latex-based barriers
  • Oil-based lubes stain the BEJEEZUS out of fabrics of all kinds.
  • Oil-based lubes are harder for the vagina to clean out and can cause an infection.

After having tried BCBL some of these facts are a little less true than others.

On to the lube!

After having tried The Butters sweet, soft, silky, and oh-so-delicious cocoa butter moisturizer, I was AMPED to try the lube. If for no other reason than the fact that I am definitely a fan of lube that smells/tastes better than the weird chemical nothing-ness of most lube. Seriously, I am not a fan of the gross, diluted, slimy lube flavor and sensation. Normal lube is like La Croix, but for genitals. It just waters down the normal tastiness of people’s bodies, and sometimes adds a film into your mouth. And BCBL delivers. It smells like chocolate, feels like butter, but tastes like…nothing.

white masculine person with brown hair in yellow shirt expressively kissing the tips of the fingers
*chef kiss*

But Rebecca, how is this different from The Butters Moisturizer?

GREAT QUESTION! When I chatted with Zanita she let me know that there wasn’t much of a difference between the lube and the moisturizer save for the preservatives in the moisturizer.

Lube: raw cocoa butter, organic aloe vera, raw shea butter, pure coconut oil, pure extra virgin olive oil, pure grapeseed oil, apple cider vinegar, guar bean powder
Moisturizer: cocoa butter, shea butter, aloe vera juice, coconut oil, grapeseed oil, guar bean powder, potassium sorbate, potassium metibisulfate, vitamin c, vitamin e

BCBL is just as moisturizing as the moisturizer, EXCEPT for those of us who have oily skin it’s not as thick and intense, and therefore does not make our faces gross. I split this and the moisturizer between my black tattoo and my feet and they both came out looking just as soft and smooth and moisturized. Even when recording it on my arm, there wasn’t even a clear winner between the two on a 90-degree day as to which melted faster.

So let’s talk about some of those oil-based lube facts. As for condoms, that doesn’t change. Even with the special magic that gets put in, latex still gets corroded. The Butters (and my) official recommendation is that you use this with polyurethane and nitrile barriers.

It is unfortunate that there is no good way for me to get a good photo of the way this lube reacts on clothes, but needless to say, the answer is fine. There may have been a point where I used my dress to clean up The Butters on some furniture and after a wash, the dress is perfectly fine, and the furniture is spiffy and shiny.

As for the rest…

Just for y’all, I tried this shit out RIGHT. Oil-based lubes have (in the past) given me a yeast infection and UTI combo whenever I looked at the bottles. But I tried this with fingers, with a partner, with silicone and hard plastic toys, every position I could handle in pain, and didn’t even pee after sex. Even with all of that, I’m fairly certain that my vagina is healthier now than it was going into the trial run.

You can call my vagina “Councilperson Moscato” thank you very much.

As for the lube itself, let’s get…visual. It was thick without being sticky, and it’s slick and definitely cushy enough to keep from any microtears during anal, but I wouldn’t use it for anything rough, because reapplications were definitely necessary. I could definitely see being using this for sex if you’re a person who experiences vulvar pain. It smells just a soft and chocolatey and incredible as the moisturizer, however, it doesn’t give “La Croix genital-flavor situation. There’s a soft fragrance of chocolate, but it doesn’t drown out the actual scent or taste of your partner. Because your partner is sexy, and you want them to taste and smell and feel like them. A slightly better moisturized them.

What (if anything) could The Butters lube do better? Well, if it came in a squeezy tube, I’d probably lose my shit. My partner and I struggled a lot with the cap any time we wanted to grab at it quickly, and a pop cap would have been great. By the time we wanted to grab for lube or needed a re-up, one or both of us had sex hands, and putting dirty hands into the lube wouldn’t necessarily have it last its lifespan. In much the same way that I don’t love dipping my fingers into my moisturizer, I don’t love dipping them into my lube. It just happens that my fingers are much cleaner when I’m putting on my moisturizer, and I don’t often have a makeup spatula laying around when I’m trying to get laid.

Dicks don’t make good spatulas either.

Other than a mild packaging change, it’s literally perfect and has replaced all the other lubes (and most lotions) on my headboard! The Butters Cocoa Butter Lube is Frisky Fairy approved. Get a 4oz container of your own for $9 here and get frisky today!

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