Butter on a white hand with a teal background that has pink cupcakes on it.

Update: 3/14/2021

Upon review, I’ve discovered the creator of The Butters Hygienics Company has made comments that do not align with my values and is not someone I want to offer a platform to. Due to the comments made, I can no longer recommend The Butters. I will do my best to find a replacement and I regret that I didn’t identify this issue sooner. In the future, I’ll do my best to ensure I’m more fully vetting the people/companies I’m reviewing. Thanks for reading!

Stay Frisky!

Oh my goodness. Time has no meaning in a pandemic, and then I sat down to write this post and realized it’d been nearly four years since I was really active. I know I’ve neglected y’all and this blog for four years, and I can’t believe you still love me. I feel like the past four years been an absolute blur, but we got through it, and now I’ve got some shiny new letters after my name!

Really, thank you, everyone, for supporting me throughout both my undergraduate and graduate degrees, and I am so excited to be The Frisky Fairy, MSW. Thank you for supporting me, loving me, staying with me through four years of silence and lack of communication.

That said, I’ve been out of the game so long I wasn’t really sure where to hop back in, and then I was so surprised to find a beautiful message in my contact folder. Zanita (The Butters “Chief Executive Assistant Left Hand Whoa-Man”) from The Butters reached out to ask if I’d like to review their products, and I was like…uh, yes. Of course. In part, because I was so glad someone was interested in working with me still, and in part, because The Butters Co. is “Black & Gay af”, and I love supporting Black businesses and my fellow LGBTQ folks.

White woman with blonde hair in red jacket raising her arms. White text reads "Hallelujah, we're saved!"
The heavens opened, a choir of angels began to sing, and The Butters began to rain down from the sky.

So let’s talk about The Butters. The Butters Hygienics Co. was created in 2015 by Jerome Nichols as a way to care for hair and skin, as well as find a safe and simple lubricant and make all of these products affordable. This is a very, very, VERY short version of the story, and I don’t want to tell it wrong, so I suggest you learn more directly from Jerome by clicking here.

So Zanita and I chatted a bit over email, and shortly thereafter, a box appeared with a fun little container of The Cocoa Butters Body Moisturizer. Listed as The Legendary Ashiness Eraser, This body moisturizer can do a little bit of everything from tip to toe. Because this isn’t a lube product, this review is going to run just a little differently.

The Cocoa Butters Body Moisturizer

From the website: Cocoa butter creates a healthy, rich skin color and offers protection from the elements. Shea provides conditioning & nutrients to help support skin health. It also helps your skin release loose dead skin and provide repair from sun damage. Coconut oil and olive oil soften and nourish. Lastly, grapeseed oil provides antioxidants and penetrates the deepest layers of skin – great for working through thick skin on hands and feet. It also works to help nail strength and health.

Great for: dishwashers, construction workers, nurses, dialysis patients, chronically ashy folks, and anyone who really needs moisture.

Before fragrances started triggering nasty asthma attacks and horrible migraines, I adored Palmer’s Cocoa Butter because I liked walking around smelling like chocolate all day. The added fragrance makes me sick though, so I had to stop using it. I was excited that The Cocoa Butters has cocoa butter in it so that maybe I could get some of that chocolate smell back without any added fragrance.

I am also generally a person who walks around barefoot. Shoes in the house just feel dirty, I’m so clumsy in socks that I will fall and hurt myself, and I just feel more stable in my bare feet. Thus the need for something that gets deep into the skin really spoke to me. I was nervous about the fact that there were many oils in this, and my skin goes from parched to greasy very quickly. But I figured if nothing else, this would be an awesome massage oil, and we could just wipe down after to keep the sheets from staining.

Dark blue bottle with black lid on a teal and grey background White and black text on brown and teal label reads "The Butters Hygienics Co. Cocoa Butters Body Moisturizer, The Legendary Ashiness Eraser"
In this photo, and from this angle, the bottle looks bigger than it is… About as big as it moisturizes.

I want to tell you I have photos of the unboxing. I want to show you the cute stickers and packaging that I got. Unfortunately, I forgot that it is above 90° outside most days, and The Butters products are made of well… oils. So I got overly excited to open the package and touch the moisturizer, and I unscrewed that cap and… there went oil all over my favorite tank top, my desk, and the packaging.

So, you know, be mindful when you first open up that cap, maybe let it sit for a few hours in a cool place. I saved my tank top with a bit of dish soap and a soak and used what was on my desk to give the wood a good polish. Then I put it down and checked it every three minutes to see if it had firmed up yet. About the same way that I check to see if the seeds I just planted have sprouted yet.

Finally, it firmed up, and it was time to dip in and play!

I want to preface all the photos below by saying that the amount I have on my hand in the photos is TOO MUCH for your hands alone. I got too excited to show it all to you, and in doing so I was able to swipe some on Wes’s arm, and still have enough for my hands, both of my arms to my shoulders, and still have it be a bit slick for about an hour after as it soaked in.

One of the first jokes I made when I took it out and put it on my hand was, “I can’t believe it’s not butter!” UNFORTUNATELY, my partner had gone upstairs, so the only person who heard my genius was the cat. He thought it was hilarious. The reason I was a hilarious genius was that The Butters looks and feels… like whipped butter.

White hand on a leg in black fabric with butter on the hand. Silver laptop is seen in the background.
It looks like butter, smells like chocolate.

I generally try not to ask for good massages from Wes too often because his job requires a lot of physical labor. But given that The Cocoa Butters arrived around the time of my birthday, I felt like it was a perfect time to ask for a massage without feeling too guilty. I also figured that a massage would also be great foreplay, and I was not incorrect. So often, anything Wes and I have used for foreplay was slimy or required us to use gloves or scrub our hands off before we could even have sex because our hands were covered in lotions that burned and stung (I have a very picky vagina).

Having my partner able touch and massage me with something natural was awesome, and being ready to go from a massage to sex without much fuss was fucking great. Imagine, when you’re in the moment, and your partner has been touching you in a way that makes you feel taken care of, and their skin is warm against yours, and their breath is warm on your neck, and then they have to stop and scrub their hands because it BURNS INSIDE OF YOU. So it’s a nice change.

Not only did I get to enjoy a birthday night of fantastic foreplay and great sex facilitated by The Butters, the next day, I got to try out on the giving end. Wes’s poor neck and shoulder were in pain after he gave me a great massage slept wrong, and it was just a dream to use The Cocoa Butters on him. This moisturizer just feels incredible both on your skin and in your hands. It is soft, creamy, and literally melts like butter on your skin (see the gif below). I adore that even though it’s unscented, it still has a silky, chocolatey smell that lasts quite a while without being overpowering. When Wes and I talked, we noted that there was great staying power. Neither of us felt that we had to reapply often. We also noted that it was nice and moist without being greasy, which is great for my persnickety skin.

Video of a white hand on a black background with yellow moisturizer melting.
Look at how sexy this is. The way it slides down the skin!

Three things happened that made this my new holy grail product:

  • I got out of the shower after the beach, and I misplaced my usual moisturizer.
  • I used Dawn (yes, the dish soap) to pull some of the blue out of my hair so that I could ready it for a different color.
  • While snuggling Wes, I reached my hand up and touched the back of his head and touched some PARCHED 4C curls.

My skin was dry after a socially-quarantined visit to the beach, and I desperately needed something on my elbows, feet, and my black ink-heavy tattoo. So I grabbed a little bit and swiped it on, and it was just magical. Not only did it make my skin feel great, but it also made my tattoo look better! I strongly recommend this for folks who don’t drink enough water. I also strongly recommend drinking more water. I also strongly recommend folks remind me to drink more water.

Now, beautiful followers, if you are on my social media, you’ve seen Wes, and you know how gorgeous he and his hair are. So you can imagine how surprised I was when I was snuggled up with him and I reached my hands back only to feel some super parched curls. I remembered that we could use The Cocoa Butters in hair, so we performed a short magic trick, and suddenly, his hair was much softer and much less thirsty and grumpy. Finding fragrance free products for natural hair can always be a struggle, so I anticipate that we’ll have jars, upon jars, upon jars of this around the house for his hair because of how great it felt after the fact.

On my end, I’ve been putting some awesome colors in, and I love it, but I want to change it up, and I can’t do that when some parts are much darker than others, so I did a lot of reading that suggested maybe Dawn dish soap could help. I washed my hair with Dawn, and even after 20 minutes with a leave-in conditioner, my hair was so dry it felt like I had bleached it. I ran some of this through my hair and let it sit only to find that my hair was softer and more workable the longer it set. What was cool was brushing it through my hair and putting it in a topknot overnight. The next day I washed it out, and my hair was much softer. As a bonus, my sheets were super tidy after using it, so I didn’t wake up with any zits on my face.

Some other big bonuses

  • The expiration date. It lasts 6-12 months, with an expiration date set at around April of 2021. I want to say this tin will last us for a long time, but that’s only if we can stop using it every time we get out of the shower.
  • Because this is all-natural, I’m not worried about what happens when I inevitably cover Romulus in it. Sometimes I worry that he will end up eating my lotion and getting sick. Now I’m not as worried.
  • The PRICE. As a person sitting on a small mountain of debt, looking at the price of these products in comparison makes me very happy. Mainly because they are very affordable for me while I’m waiting to start that post-grad life with the Cocoa Butters is $8.88, and a 4oz jar of The Butters lube at no more than $9. Most comparable products I use and love (and buy a lot of) cost about twice that, which makes this so much better.

I honestly think that the only thing that I don’t love about The Cocoa Butters is that it’s not also a lube! I didn’t get a chance to try any of the lubes yet. But I will. If this sort of softness and moisture is what I have to look forward to, sign me the fuck up.

At $8.88 for 4oz, The Cocoa Butters Body Moisturizer gets The Frisky Fairy seal of approval. Get Frisky and get yours here.

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