Yeah, yeah, yeah, I’ve been preetty quiet. I know y’all missed me so hard.
Unfortunately, that random silence with slight bits of chattiness is going to continue at least until September (Possibly longer). Please follow me on Facebook, Instagram, or on Twitter @TheFriskyFairy to get real life shots of what I’m up to. (And also my cat!)
So I am a TOTAL SLUT for subscription boxes, and long have I bemoaned the lack of sex box full of body safe goodies. When Unbound poked at me about reviewing their box and I gave the site a look, I decided that maybe, just maybe it was time to give sexy subscription boxes a chance.
First things first, the box!
The box itself is shipped in a dull white cardboard box. Where are my DILDO COVERED SHIPPING BOXES? HMMMMMMM? Where is my Amazon box with the neon sign saying “Slutty McSlutterpants lives here and is ordering toys de sex”? Why does no one give me the destructively inappropriate shipping containers that I desire/deserve? But fiiiiiiine. Since you all want to have nice polite boxes to ship in because the world isn’t sex positive, I’ll stop being grumpy about it, and instead focus on what’s in the box itself.
One of my favorite things about subscription boxes is that they’re full of surprises. It’s like that one time I got an Amazon order that I don’t remember ordering, only to find it was full of things I ordered, while I was on Ambien. On one hand it’s like “what the fuck am I about to find in here” and on the other it’s like “OOH SURPRISES!”. What’s nice about the Unbound box is that it leaves the little card on top so you can either cast it aside like the birthday card from your grandma (Call her, yeah?), or you can read it lovingly before digging into the main event.
Which brings us to the main event. I’m gonna go over each individual bit first.
First up is this cute little arousal gel! I found it interesting that it’s got ginger in it. Most of these arousal gels uses mints and such to create various sensations, but ginger is already super tingly! I opted not to use this because of the glycerin, but it smelled REALLY good (apparently it tastes good too, says Google)!
Next up was a body chain. I haven’t found a body chain that fits me yet, and I wasn’t exactly sure what happened with this one, so this is what I came up with. After that I stopped being silly and looked up how it’s supposed to be worn and tried that. No dice. I assumed it was the smaller one, and spoke with my Unbound contact who told me that it could totally be swapped out! The chain (while sexy) comes in two sizes, so select accordingly:
- Regular = 36” slung around the waist (fits up to size 32” comfortably)
- Curve = 40” slung around the waist (fits up to size 36” comfortably)
The Bijoux Insidscrets pasties are some of my favorites. I got a pair while I was in Las Vegas with my bestie, and when they died I was quite sad. It’s awesome that I have another pair now…especially since I go to quite a few more play parties than I used to. One thing I super love about these is that the adhesive is not terribly bad. I am HORRIBLY allergic to adhesives, but these I can wear for a couple hours before my skin even starts itching.
Maybe I’m super weird, but I just don’t understand the point of lingerie storage bags. I imagine if I had some REALLY NICE lingerie it’d be useful, but I don’t because I don’t have that kind of money. That being said, it is a suuuuper cute little cotton bag, and I’ll be using it to carry an extra pair of panties in my handbag when I go on dates! #casualsex
JimmyJane has released a line of their popular toys that are battery powered and more reasonably priced for people to try them. I’m not JimmyJane’s biggest fan, but I can’t deny that their toys are pretty fucking cool. I have and adore the Form 2, so while this one is undeniably weaker than it’s rechargeable counterpart, it’s pretty great as a starter!
With every good, there must come a bad (AKA “why must you millenials always have something to complain about??”)
I will say about the site is that there is a distinct lack of diversity in the models on the site. The models are all thin women, but that is *slightly* made better by the fact that there are at least a few thing black women! There is the ability to choose sizes in the box, which is nice. That being said, there aren’t really many options for plus sizes yet, however since they seem to be really dedicated to working with companies that are body safe, I’m sure they’ll pick up some more. They’re really going in the right direction by working with Hanky Panky (That retro thong is AMAZING), and Oh La La Cherie (who I love, and had some beautiful pieces from!), I just wish there were more options for quality fat girl lingerie. But that’s an argument for another time…
The other thing I’ll note is that it’s very heteronormative. They seem super new on the scene and I have faith that they’ll pick it up, but it seems really targeted towards heterosexual, femme, cis-women.
With all of this in mind, take a look at this haul. Unbound has taken quality, body safe, designer toys, and put them in the hands of people who might not otherwise be able to afford them. And trust, I’ve gone through each individual box looking to find fault. The fact that they’re not 100% body positive, and they’re a bit focused on a specific clientele (which is a huge bummer, don’t get me wrong), doesn’t erase how awesome it is
All in all, Unbound is an fantastic quarterly subscription box, and they seem dedicated to customer care and body positivity/sexuality. I strongly suggest you sign yourself up, or sign up the femme in your life. Unbound gets the Frisky Fairy seal of approval, and I hope that they grow bigger, better, and more sex positive!
P.S. Unbound, if y’all want to send me the plus size bachelorette box, I’d be thrilled. I’m going back to single rather than up to married, but I’d still love it <3