I will not tolerate abusive or harassing behavior on my site. My site, my rules. Don’t like it? GTFO. I will not tolerate victim blaming, shaming, or other incendiary comments that trash victims of sexual assault or consent violations. Those comments will be deleted immediately without approval. This is to serve as a content notice about sexual assault, consent, etc. Settle in friends, because this one’s a doozy. By now, most of the people in my community have heard about Kelly Shibari speaking out about her experience of consent violations with Reid Mihalko. Before I continue I want to make a few things clear: IRead More →

I want you to know that there will be a blog post with the transcript to this video (I pre-wrote it, Facebook live video is embedded at the bottom), that will include the links I’m talking about in the (possibly likely) event that this video gets taken down and I get banned again. Follow me @TheFriskyFairy on Twitter if that happens. I also want to let you know that this post will contain comments with lots of violence. Please be prepared. So for those of you who didn’t know, I spent a lovely weekend with my partner and Romulus, Prince of Cats. We spent timeRead More →

I have been struggling a lot lately, so I figured today is a great day to write down some things that I wish. Things my mental illness steals from me. I have Borderline Personality Disorder, Bipolar II Disorder, and Generalized Anxiety Disorder. To be honest, it is miserable to live in my brain. I don’t recommend it, but here’s a little insight into what goes on in here. 1. I wish I could let shit go, rather than replay it over and over in my brain. Unfortunately, it’s always there. Every time I upset someone. Every time there’s a conflict. Every time I feel badRead More →

Hellooooooo my loves. I hope you’ve been well. I had a great time over my birthday, and I even had a birthday party that turned into an “adult swim” after the kids had gone to bed. I’ve had a few doctors appointments after that (remind me to write a post about the Mirena), which is why I’ve been so silent. All in all, 26 is shaping up to be a damn fine year. Which brings us to the less lovely part of my post. Unfortunately, the past few months I’ve been hiding something from you all. Part of this is the fact that despite posting andRead More →

I spend a few days playing with my shiny new Hitachi and come back to utter chaos in the form of a group of teenagers who apparently did some magical shit with latex, which was nearly cancelled out by the SCOTUS ruling on same sex marriage. Here’s the only thing I’m going to say on the Same-Sex marriage ruling: #lovewins but remember how many we lost to get here, and don’t forget how much more progress is left to go. — Rebecca Hiles (@TheFriskyFairy) June 26, 2015   If you haven’t heard about the condom thing, here’s a basic rundown. A group of teens inRead More →

I have written about my cancer journey before. I’ve mentioned my care team, who make my life easier, and their credentials. I’ve written about how to interact with cancer patients. I’ve even spoken on the topic for a third time at Woodhull Sexual Freedom Summit. I’ve tried to be kind and jovial, and reasonable about the entire thing. I’ve tried to be educational. I’ve tried to be happy just to be alive. I just can’t anymore. I can’t advocate for patient rights, I can’t advocate for science without a little venom. Coming off a post raging against alternative medicine, I can’t be quiet about it anymore.Read More →

EDIT: I will no longer be replying to comments. Provided they are not death threats, rape threats, or threats against me or mine I will still approve them through. However, I have better things to do. Like my partners. Xoxo   You know… I’ve got a pretty solid soapbox here. Because of that, I get to talk about issues that I feel really strongly about. Tonight, I’m going to talk about issues that I feel really fucking strongly about. Maybe it’s because I just saw Mad Max: Fury Road and Imperator Furiosa is basically everything I want to be as a person. Maybe it’s because IRead More →

**UPDATE- 4/10 22:21 EST** I mentioned in this post that it was hacked, that was incorrect of me. The person who created the list simply exploited Fetlife’s code to release information. This information (while not directly outing people) could be used to out people. If you’re concerned, I strongly suggest removing all identifying photos. **In addition, Fetlife has been terrible at protecting their communities (specifically those who are sexually assaulted). Please don’t take my silence as an indication that these weren’t issues before, I simply haven’t had the chance to write about them, whereas this was slightly more time sensitive. ***Finally, it appears that for whatever reasonRead More →

I will not tolerate abusive or harassing behavior on my site. My site, my rules. Don’t like it? GTFO. This is to serve as both a content notice and a notice about NSFW language and images. Poly Living Philadelphia! This weekend (if you’ve been following me on Twitter), you may have noticed that I was at Poly Living Philadelphia. PLP is a reasonably small con hosted by Loving More, a non-profit that focuses on poly activism and relationship choice. There were a number of amazing things to come out of the weekend. I shared some pretty spectacular kisses. I met some new friends, and some friends I hadRead More →

I will not tolerate abusive or harassing behavior on my site. My site, my rules. Don’t like it? GTFO. This is to serve as both a trigger warning and a warning about NSFW language and/or images I know, you’re all probably tired of hearing about Fifty Shades of Grey. EVERYONE is talking about it, and frankly, it’s exhausting. I’m tired of hearing about Fifty Shades of Grey (henceforth FSOG), but I’m also tired of having to re-explain my points. More than anything though, I’m tired of seeing industry professionals defend this book. Here are some things that I feel about this book: The argument thatRead More →