Butter on a white hand with a teal background that has pink cupcakes on it.

Update: 3/14/2021 Upon review, I’ve discovered the creator of The Butters Hygienics Company has made comments that do not align with my values and is not someone I want to offer a platform to. Due to the comments made, I can no longer recommend The Butters. I will do my best to find a replacement and I regret that I didn’t identify this issue sooner. In the future, I’ll do my best to ensure I’m more fully vetting the people/companies I’m reviewing. Thanks for reading! Stay Frisky!-Rebecca Oh my goodness. Time has no meaning in a pandemic, and then I sat down to write thisRead More →


I’m not sure if you’ve been paying attention to what’s been going on in the US lately (or for that matter around the world), but shit’s gotten real intense. It’s because of this that I admit I have been too quiet. I haven’t used this platform the way I should have. I don’t have much to say beyond that, but I will say this: If you’re placing property above human lives, you’re an incredibly cruel person. Black lives are more important than a lamp at Target. Regardless, here’s what you can do currently if you’re trying to join the revolution and feeling stuck. My recommendedRead More →

Because I’ve missed you, and so very much has changed. I can’t wait to fill you in! If you haven’t been following me on Facebook or Instagram, here’s a quick run-down of what’s been going on! I co-founded a queer events company called Glittergasm Events with the amazing Rachael Rose of Hedonish I came out as non-binary! I finished my Bachelor’s degree! I’m now I’m elbow-deep in my Master’s program! But I’m also very, very excited to announce that I will be speaking at THREE conferences in 2020. Poly Living Philadelphia: February 7-9, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania Southwest Love Fest: April 2-5, Tucson, Arizona RelateCon Boise: AprilRead More →

I’m a slut. Slutty McSlutterson over here. I’ll sleep with just about anyone who piques my interest. Kidding (but not really). In reality, I identify as a megasexual. Dr. Liz Powell and I coined the term “Megasexual“ at our panel “Actually, it *is* About the Sex” during Atlanta Poly Weekend 2015. We defined Megasexual as: Megasexuals are characterized as individuals who lack emotional connection toward any person or persons unless they first form a strong sexual connection with someone. The level of sexual connection it takes for an emotional bond to form is often dependent on the initial attraction to the person. It is anRead More →

I will not tolerate abusive or harassing behavior on my site. My site, my rules. Don’t like it? GTFO. I will not tolerate victim blaming, shaming, or other incendiary comments that trash victims of sexual assault or consent violations. Those comments will be deleted immediately without approval. This is to serve as a content notice about sexual assault, consent, etc. Settle in friends, because this one’s a doozy. By now, most of the people in my community have heard about Kelly Shibari speaking out about her experience of consent violations with Reid Mihalko. Before I continue I want to make a few things clear: IRead More →

There is a person I love dearly. He’s one of my people. He’s one of the people who have pushed me when I needed pushed, and been a safe harbor for me in a storm. He gives nods to me every chance he gets, and I try to do the same when I can. Behold, Kevin Patterson of Poly Role Models. You see, in addition to his 18 billion speaking engagements (THE KEYNOTESSSSS), his multiple partners, his muggle job, and his tiny humans he managed to write a book. Kevin has been working on has finished a book for the polyamorous community that can shed someRead More →

Lean in, my darlings, because I’m about to tell you a secret… You see, I’m afraid of other women. Not even necessarily women, but folks who have identified or lived as women for big parts of their lives. So I thought, if *I’M* afraid, surely other folks are too. And I brought the idea of this topic up to a bunch of amazing folks, only to hear the same thing: “I am bisexual, but I’ve never really (kissed/had sex with/dated/etc.) another woman, because I don’t know how to approach them.” Some of the reasons beyond “I don’t know how to approach them” included “They don’tRead More →

I want you to know that there will be a blog post with the transcript to this video (I pre-wrote it, Facebook live video is embedded at the bottom), that will include the links I’m talking about in the (possibly likely) event that this video gets taken down and I get banned again. Follow me @TheFriskyFairy on Twitter if that happens. I also want to let you know that this post will contain comments with lots of violence. Please be prepared. So for those of you who didn’t know, I spent a lovely weekend with my partner and Romulus, Prince of Cats. We spent timeRead More →

I have been struggling a lot lately, so I figured today is a great day to write down some things that I wish. Things my mental illness steals from me. I have Borderline Personality Disorder, Bipolar II Disorder, and Generalized Anxiety Disorder. To be honest, it is miserable to live in my brain. I don’t recommend it, but here’s a little insight into what goes on in here. 1. I wish I could let shit go, rather than replay it over and over in my brain. Unfortunately, it’s always there. Every time I upset someone. Every time there’s a conflict. Every time I feel badRead More →

Hello lovelies! Today I want to talk about something really important to me.  This something that touches everyone, this reason that I do what I do, my passion in life: Sexual freedom. We live in a world where sexual freedom is not a given. It’s not a given to be at peace in your own body. It’s not a given to be able to love yourself. It’s not a given to be unashamed of who you are on the basis of your identities. This. Touches. Everyone. I’m not sure if I’ve ever mentioned it before, but ever since I was a kid I knew IRead More →