The Frisky Fairy Reviews favorite toys, books, blogs, and other fun sex education reviews!
It has taken me far too long to get around to reviewing this book, and I am worse for it. I received an Advanced copy from Cleis Press to review around Valentine’s Day and simply never got to it. It was sitting, gathering dust on my desk until I brushed it off to flip through it a few days ago.
I haven’t put it down.
First things first, this book is amazing regardless of your relationship or sexual orientation. I found it to have a ton of information for couples. This could be extended for triads or quads, but being as I operate as more of a one-on-one poly girl rather than a group poly girl I found this to be very useful. The book really focuses on connecting with your partner rather than just communicating, and I found a lot of the information within to be really well researched and well written. I will say that the book has a heavier leaning towards non-monogamy, but the way Partners in Passion explores relationships and communication allows you to take what you learn about various lifestyles and apply it to your relationships, regardless of your relationship structure.
I really love that this book is both technical and scientific as well as warm and holistic. Not that the scientific and holistic communities are at odds, but I rarely see them working together in such an even way. There is no sense of any one lifestyle or choice being “better” or “more enlightened” and for that I am incredibly grateful. There are a few parts which I find to be a bit “crunchy granola”. I’m not a tantra girl, and I’m not really the kind of person who deals in energy between partners and using breathing to communicate, but there is enough information in this book for people to get a basic idea on some simple tantra techniques. As I said, I’m not a tantra girl. I found that this book was incredible because I don’t like tantra, and so it is incredibly rare to find a book that makes me want to learn more.
One of the very best things I loved about this book as an educator is the incredibly detailed resource guide in the back of the book. The guide gives links, book names, and names of contacts for a number of incredible groups and also incredible events to attend. I’ll admit, I was really impressed with the authors for posting such an amazing guide. As a person who is in relationships, the very best thing I loved about this book was the entire chapter on “Going the Distance” which focuses on ways to continue your relationship and to consciously date your partner during your relationship.
I also really loved and appreciated how the book approaches exploring non-monogamy and BDSM, especially when prior to those chapters, there is an entire chapter discussing how to build sexual trust with your partners. I find that to be incredibly important and also really valuable as a tool to create an ideal relationship.
This book is less of a tips and tricks book, and more of a toolbox to help create, maintain, and even rebuild relationships. I’ll be picking up a copy that includes all the pictures soon, and I’m recommending it to all of my friends.
My biggest complaints about the book is that it’s a bit more heteronormative than I’d like- though it makes great strides comparative to other books in the genre. There’s also a pretty egregious lack of use of the Oxford Comma.
I love this book and I think you will too! Partners in Passion: A Guide to Great Sex, Emotional Intimacy and Long-Term Love gets the Frisky Fairy seal of approval. Get frisky and get yours here!
Until Next Time!
-The Frisky Fairy