The Frisky Fairy Reviews every other Friday of the month! Come back for my favorite toys, books, blogs, and other fun sex education reviews!
I’m back! Sorry about the disappearing act friends, I had some technical issues to sort out. Now that they’re good, I’m back to reviewing! Yay! This week I’m reviewing Oral Sex You’ll Never Forget written by Sonia Borg. I have definitely had the pleasure of reading through this book before, and I have used it when writing a few of my workshops. Unfortunately, I wanted this book to be different than others in the Oral Sex…Never Forget series and I was disappointed.This review will contain some profanity and some NSFW images.
For those of you who are fans of Dr. Borg’s books, you’ll note that the set up is very similar to Oral Sex He’ll Never Forget and Oral Sex She’ll Never Forget. For those of you who aren’t familiar, let’s break it down. There are two sections in this book, Part 1: Mindblowing Fellatio and Part 2: Mindblowing Cunnilingus. At the start of each section is an in-depth anatomy guide if you’re a bit rusty on your body parts. This anatomy guide also includes information about the Pubococcygeus (PC) muscle in men and women and how to find them. This is a really awesome inclusion because many people forget that men have and use their PC muscles. There is also a mention about the sexual response cycle which I love, but that’s mostly because I love really in-depth education.
The back of the book contains one of my favorite things in a book about oral sex. A Yes, No, Maybe List. For those who don’t know, a Yes, No, Maybe list is a great little tool to help you talk about sex with your partner and identify your likes and dislikes. It’s wonderful. The back of the book also contains a resource guide, however, most of the tools in the resource guide seem geared towards women, and it would be nice to see a couple that were cunnilingus based for men to pick up on.
Once you get into the actual book, you’ll start to notice that each technique has a very similar pattern:
Perfect the Move
The Sexpert Says and/or Sex Fact and/or Variations.
Each of these are really useful pieces of information. The Short Explanation just gives a brief paragraph to get you interested. Perfect the Move tells you what you can do to make it better, and give your oral sex game a little more polish. The Scenario includes things like “Last-Minute Preparation” and alternative positions to make things more comfortable. The Technique gives you a step-by-step rundown of how to perform the this specific sex move. The Sexpert Says is a portion of the page that uses “expert” information on how to please your partner more. While some of the information is really awesome, some of it falls a bit flat and is something you could read in Cosmo. The Sex Fact is one of my favorite portions, as it lists a relevant sex education fact. There were definitely pieces of information that surprised me in there, and I really liked it. Variations is basically what it sounds like, variations on the technique or the scenario listed. Some of the techniques and Scenarios are a bit cheesy, but they aren’t bad, and they do give really good information for someone looking on how to step up their oral sex game.
Overall, I really like this book, because I think it is still better than some of the other options as far as oral sex books go, but I have some pretty big problems with it. All of the books in the Oral Sex…Never Forget series are heteronormative to a fault. There are no same-sex couples, and there’s maybe one option for a potential threesome and that is only in the men’s category. Do women not enjoy threesomes?
The language in the book is also incredibly normative, and frankly a bit offensive with how stereotypical the language is. I understand writing for your audience, but this is 2014, and we really should be beyond things like “I am quite certain that there are some super nerve endings traveling from her feet to her clit. (Why else would we love shoes so much?)”.
Being perfectly honest, I found that I had a hard time enjoying this book as anything more than an occasional workshop resource because I found the language to be a bit condescending. The entire line of books is like this, but I haven’t read anything else by Dr. Borg, so maybe it’s just her writing style? Either way, I wish that this book gave a bit more credit to the readers rather than coming across as though every time the reader encounters genitalia they simply don’t know what to do with it.
While I really enjoy that each scenario has an image to help visual learners, I also really have a problem with how lacking these books are in terms of diversity. There are maybe one or two models who aren’t Caucasian, but it’s hard to tell. They are all slim bodied and the most diverse thing in the book is that there are some small breasted women, and some larger breasted women. Everyone is flawlessly airbrushed, and they just don’t look like happy couples, they look like they were hired to get naked for cameras. Again, there are no same-sex couples, barring the potential for the “hot bi girlfriend” option in the threesome scenario.
Again, as far as oral sex books go, I find that this is a better one if you can ignore the aesthetics of the models. I’m giving it the Frisky Fairy stamp of approval because of content, not aesthetic. In the next reprint, can we please get some fucking noticeable diversity?
The Oral Sex You’ll Never Forget book contains everything from Oral Sex She’ll Never Forget and Oral Sex He’ll Never Forget except for one scenario (and I don’t particularly think that one is all that great), so save yourself some money and pick up a copy that you and your partner can share.